Most people have heard some version of this line, sometimes attributed to Woody Allen: “Seventy percent of life is just showing up.”
That always left me a little flat, but it is undeniable that—to cite another old saying, this one about the lottery—“you can’t win if you don’t play.”
Getting yourself there, wherever the next there is, takes a bit of effort on some days. Respect to that. Especially when it feels like there’s no winning to be had.
Another reason might be that there’s a degree of difficulty in the situation, perhaps the one keeping you up at night. Or, to use a theater reference, the scene coming that you need to show up in. You might not be at ease with what you are showing up for or how that may go for you. Including how you might respond if your worst worries are triggered by this or that–or them.
Here’s where taking up that other 30 percent matters. Instead of doing what you normally or, by default, tend to do when things are difficult, get ready. Prepare. Rehearse. This can be done in moments or extended into something more elaborate for bigger challenges. General questions give you a start, and getting more practice with them gives you a routine that doesn’t guarantee some predetermined outcome to a scene but that gives you a much better chance of fulfilling your intentions for being there.
The first general question: “What does this scene need?” This starts the ball rolling. It gets you exploring what’s to happen, why it is happening and how you expect it to happen—including what it might be like to be in the scene, you and others. This involves the largely untaught skill of contextual thinking, with a good dose of perspective taking. Both can be difficult to do when we are caught up in something.
A companion question: “What do I want to offer?” This turns back to you. It gets at why might you be there, what’s expected of you and what you sense you can contribute to it. And want to contribute to it, grounded in your intentions and based on something you see as possible and good.
There’s more to getting ready. This is the heart of what I call the rehearsal practice: becoming believably you, both with authenticity and a fitting-in awareness that can meet people where they are, takes some regular inner work. You do it because the discretionary 30% might matter, making the difference between moving forward together with others rather than being stuck in the same old pattern. It might mean satisfaction in having taken on the challenge that life and leading presented, knowing that you gave it what you believe it deserved.
You also might see yourself continuing to grow: in self-awareness, in situational awareness, in influence and perhaps even courage. And, in knowing that you offered 100% of what you intended, you might also sleep a little better.
Fred Jones is offering a workshop series in summer 2026 called Showing up Ready that centers on a repeatable, scalable Rehearsal practice and uses the Leading on Stage tools. The small group format includes a dose of 1:1 coaching, and the series comes with add-ons for those who want to take it farther. https://www.cultivatingleadership.com/courses/showing-up-ready